This time of year never seems to get easier. It’s like even when things are going well, there is still something preventing you from being happy.
It’s like a never ending funk. One that no matter how many things are going right, still makes life feel like it is wrong.
Aside from the cold (which I hate enough myself), the holiday season makes you grieve your loved ones over again. It leaves you stuck remembering that this person is no longer here and every single thing around you is a reminder of that.
Did I mention I hate this time of year?
It makes me want to curl up in bed and stay there. The holiday season makes me distant from everyone and there’s not much I can do to fix it.
Life just isn’t the same without my mom and I don’t know about yours, but my mom and I spent the holidays together. She was my best friend. Life is just not the way it should be without her.
So on top of all of the other crappy things that are happening in my day to day life….. The holidays never fail to make things that much harder.
But never the less, we have to move forward. We don’t have a choice. So we preserve, we carry on and we live this life for our beautiful loved ones in heaven.
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Also, here are some great resources for anyone who has lost a mother
https://www.facebook.com/iamamotherlessdaughter/
https://www.facebook.com/Motherless-Daughters-153858391294874/?fref=ts
https://www.facebook.com/MyMomIsInHeaven/?fref=ts
https://www.facebook.com/MyMomIsWithGod/
There was a time when Christmas was, by far, my favourite time of year. My Mom’s and mine. We were like two kids in a candy store. We loved the lights and the music and sitting in the mall watching the hustle and bustle going on around. And the kids, just watching their little faces when they first spotted Santa, would tug at our hearts.
Our entire family would meet at the folk’s place for the day. We’d pack all our gifts and head out before 8 am, because if we weren’t there by 8:05 am our phone would ring. Mom would do the breakfast table and I would do the dinner. She was always up before 5 am making sure everything was perfect. And it always was.
But now those times are gone. The lights don’t shine, the music is flat, even the little kids bring no response from me. It’s just a day I’m forced to wear a smile and pretend that life is normal. Something it never will be again.
I’m certainly sorry for the loss of any family member. It’s never easy. But we live on and should celebrate their life and live ours. Mourning is healthy. Not living life to its fullest and giving reason to be depressed because of the most natural aspect and certainty in life, is selfish. This person is no longer in the physical and now I can blame their loss on the reasons I am unhappy. This mentality is not reality. And It hurts others who need to heal. I am sorry for your loss but I hope you can get clarity from this perspective and live your life to its fullest and use your words and power to inspire others instead of giving them reason to stay depressed. Everybody dies. We should celebrate their life and be thankful for the time spent. Happy holidays!