You know that super cliché saying “you don’t know what you’ve got till’ its gone”? It is true. I mean don’t get me wrong; I always knew my mom was one of kind. I knew she was genuine, caring, supportive, loving and my biggest fan. But I NEVER thought about what my life would be like without her. I never thought about her leaving this earth too early and missing so many things.
I took for granted the moments we shared assuming there would be many more. I took for granted the little things because I never thought there would be a day I wouldn’t have them. I took for granted the fact that my mom wouldn’t be around forever, never thinking for a second that she would be taken from my life so soon.
I loved my mom dearly. I enjoyed every second that we had together. But I never thought those moments would be gone this early in my life. I never knew that so many of those wonderful times would become just memories that I have left of the person I loved so deeply.
So learn from that.
Cherish every single moment with your mom.
Pick up the phone and call her.
Tell her about your day.
Stop by her house just to lay in bed and be present.
Apologize for your wrongs & forgive her mistakes.
Never take the time you have with her for granted.
When my mom got sick my world was flipped upside down. I was not ready to lose her. I was not ready to have to figure out how to conquer this really scary world without the person who I thought was always supposed to be there.
I didn’t know how to live without her. I didn’t want to know how. To this day, I am still trying to survive in world that doesn’t include my favorite person
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Also, here are some great resources for anyone who has lost a mother
https://www.facebook.com/iamamotherlessdaughter/
https://www.facebook.com/Motherless-Daughters-153858391294874/?fref=ts
So True..I lost both of my parents not a day goes by that I don’t think of them or miss them.
So true, I lost my mom at the age 11,it really hit me hard,and still does.I lost out on so much with her.I was mad at her for leaving me,my dad wasn’t ready to raise a girl so off i went to my sister’s. She tried but she wasn’t mom.dont take your mom for granted or even your dad you really don’t how much you need them and miss them when they’re gone
May I suggest to your readers, if your mother is living, on YOUR birthday send her flowers or a card thanking her for your birth. My daughter sent me flowers to work on her birthday, I felt special. ❤️
My mother died 15 years ago today. She was in a nursing home for 4 years during which she lost the ability to do one thing after another until she was completely helpless. I tried to visit with her every day. It was painful to watch her decline. She had dementia and after a while she didn’t know my name and didn’t speak. I wanted to be there to be sure her needs were met since she would never ask for anything. I brought her treats, went to Mass with her, picked the outfits she would wear each day, gave her manicures, arranged her weekly hair appt, decorated her room for the seasons, put a birdfeeder outside her window, brought a bulletin board with old photos, anything I could. Her skin was so soft; I loved to touch her cheeks and hands or give her a peck on the cheek. Then one night the hospice nurse told my sister Ali and I that it would be a good idea for us to stay the night and we did. We slept in recliners and were awakened by the nurse who told us our mother had died. I’m so grateful we were there! Earlier in the evening, the nurse washed our mother’s hair and feet, and she wrapped one of my mother’s rosaries in her hands. My mother was wearing her scapular; she really wanted to be wearing a scapular when she died. She was at peace and so was I. I didn’t have any regrets for things I wish I had done or not done; I knew I did everything I could to help her and make those years nice for her, whether she was aware or not. I didn’t have my usual coulda, woulda, shoulda. I was grateful I had those four years with her. But oh man would I love to see her again and kiss her soft cheek! I dream about her and I’m also grateful for that. I love you Mother.
Thanks so much for this post. I have my own daughter to deal with this same subject since the passing of my mom, a little over a year ago. I feel I need to let her know this same information, as after the passing of my mom, I thought we would remain closer, but it has been a struggle. I guess I just have to come right out and say to her don’t waste time with unforgiveness, and bitterness and resentment. You will find after your mom is no longer with you, how bad you feel now for having wasted all that negative emotion during the time you were together, when you could have been loving and cherishing every moment you had…..
If I only knew when is the time when my Mom will be in heaven, I should have cherish every moment with her. I should have stayed with her when she is all alone while I was away working for myself.. if only i knew..
I have lost my mom as well and all of what you wrote I could of wrote too. It’s been 24 years in July and I still miss her dearly. I talk about her a lot and i have pics of her all over my house. I still cry when i tell stories of her I still cry when i think of her , especially when there’s something I want to tell her or something I need "my mom" for…and that is still.. Everyday. Cherish your mom cause you just never know…
I hope you don’t mind my commenting on your tender post, but it really hit me as I read it.
I guess I have a twist on your post…My momma is 94 years old and still alive. I am the youngest of 9 children. She was abusive to them but because she was, a few of then were very abusive to me. So I struggled with her my whole life. Which isn’t fair to her, I know. But I’m very personal and not touchy feely and sometimes it creeps me out as I was sexually abused by her son from a previous marriage. I became very cautious at who I let in my "circle". I have always loved hugs from my beautiful children and my beautiful grandbabies and my amazing hubby. But I could never let anyone else in that circle – other than a few besties.
Now I look at her feeble body and the hard abusive side has left her and a sweet little old lady in its place. She has been through a literal hell in her life. I wish I could go back and give her the love she always wanted to feel from me. I have always loved my mom but I could never be lovey-dovey with her.
Your post really touched me. I do not know of your sorrow as I have never experienced it. I pray as someone else reads your post that has a chance to make things right with their mother, I beg – please do. No matter how old she is, don’t take for granted she will always be there – body and mind.
Mothers are peculiar people! They went through a lot to get us here. Some of us have gone through a literal hell to get our beautiful babies here. You never know what she went through to make her the person she is. So be a little kinder. Be a little more compassionate. Be a little more grateful to God for creating mothers – and especially the one that is yours.